Monday, October 3, 2011

Sparkle

Dear G,

Sometimes I wish it’s just the pressure from work that’s keeping you distracted and somehow away from me. I hope you’re just tired from work that’s why you prefer to sit quietly in front on your laptop than to be with me. I wish it’s just your crazy schedule that’s keeping us apart.

I’m not asking you to change. I’m not saying that you’re not doing enough. You will always be enough. But sometimes, I also want to be treated like a princess. Sometimes, I also want to experience things my way. I want to be cuddled, hugged, kissed in the shoulder. I want to be surprised with a bouquet of flowers. I want to find secret notes in my bag. I want to come home and see you bought the book that I’ve been waiting for ages.

I want to feel that I’m special. I want to know that I matter. I want to know that you know I exist. That I have feelings. That I have things in my mind that I wish you would read.

Sometimes I feel that I’ve made things so convenient for you that you are slowly taking me for granted. You no longer take that extra mile; you no longer go out of your way to do things for me. And I’m partly to blame for spoiling you, for always putting your wants and your needs before mine.

But I’m tired of that. It’s always the same cycle. Things hasn’t changed for quite a long time. I need change.

I need sparkle.